My post for today is about the ways and means of making a girl fall in love according to Filipino men. Since, most respondents-cum-generous advisers reside in the Philippines, please find the liberty to assume that their tips apply primarily on wooing Filipino women.


BE NATURAL

“Take it from an old man. The best thing to do is be yourself and don't pretend to be what you are not. Be natural. That way, girls would fall for you on the basis of your own character, your own merits and demerits, core values and beliefs. Not on the basis of any illusion. It will work for some women, it would fail in some but this way the one who will fall for you will love you in a deeper, more meaningful way. It’s not good to be in a relationship where the basis is something shallow. ” – Percival

True. Some guys treat “ligaw” [courtship] as an opportunity to put their best foot forward. In fact, some men refrain from smoking and drinking liquor while the courtship is ongoing with the belief that these habits repulse their ladylove. But in reality, we, I mean us Pinay girls would like to have someone who is not afraid to show who they are at the early stages of courtship.


BE A SPONTANEOUS ROMANTIC

“In being romantic, I believe that it is not something that you plan for. Your being romantic should be something that is spontaneous. Do the initiative of being demonstrative to your partner. Holding her hands while walking is very effective. Know when and where to give her a smack/kiss.” – Japs

It is nice when men make surprises, like for example giving something when we least expect it. It’s sweet because it shows that he is attentive to our every need even if we don’t say it.


KNOW HER “KILITI” [weakness e.g. chocolates, music]

Don’t take “weakness” literally because this could mean a lot of things. “Kiliti” may include her likes, her hobbies and interests. In essence, you may need to find a way where you both can connect to each other. Just like what Ruben says, “My style is simple. I try to take advantage of her “weaknesses.”


MAKE HER LAUGH

“Don’t be so tight. You should show her that you are fun to be with and that she’ll have a great time with you. Sometimes you can also use this technique to size her up, to know what she’s thinking, etc.” –Jay4ever

Filipinos are happy people. Even in times or adversity, we always managed to smile and laugh so understandably, people who have a great sense of humor turns us on. We want to be with someone who knows how to give us a good laugh.


SHOWER HER WITH COMPLIMENTS AND MORE

“Tell her she is pretty and that she's nice to be with. Women love compliments. Do not ever flirt with other women when you're on a date. The girl you're with should get all your attention.Treat them with respect. Treat them like you'd like another guy to treat your mother or sister. Hold her hand in the movie, open the door for her, and be polite. Act like she's precious and sweet. When you bring her home, give her a good night kiss at the door and say "pwede bang tawagan kita ulit? [Can I call you again?]" She'll be amazed at being treated like a lady.” - Prinsipe

“Leave your ego at the door. Talk about her instead of talking about yourself. Compliment her without deluding her. A smart chick knows kung sincere ka or "nambobola" [making artificial compliments] ka lang. ” - Chito

Yes, make us feel better about ourselves. It’s one of our basic needs.


HAVE MANNERS

“My girlfriend told me before that the best thing she liked about me is my politeness esp. when I’m talking to her parents and relatives. She said she’s never seen anybody as “good” as me.” – Philip

The best way to show that you have manners is when you say “po” and opo” when talking to someone older than you are. Besides that, if you want to take a lady out on a date, asking permission from her parents to do so is a plus!


FORMULA TO SUCCESS

“For me a guy needs: 25%- looks, 72% personality (esp. sense of humor; you need to have a lot) and 3% for self esteem. Your emotional and financial status also counts.” –Karaski

This is especially true because Pinay nowadays have evolved into very smart and practical human beings. But of course, “love factor” has always been the top priority. But if you’re a guy who can be depended on, a guy who is responsible, then that makes your chances better.


LOVE THE PEOPLE SHE LOVES

“In our culture, it pays to have blessings from all people that your girl loves. This includes her best friend, her "barkada" [peers], believe it or not her officemates and of course her parents. If they’re against you, it can be tough. You really have to exert effort to gain their love and respect. It’s worth it. “ – Julius

There was a guy who expressed interest with my best friend but for some reason I didn’t like him so he wasn’t able to reach first base. Simply put, opinions of people that matter is really important for a guy to succeed in winning a girl.


TIPS FROM THE AUTHOR


Based on my own observation, the following should help:

1. Call us before we hit the sack. It makes you the last person in our minds.


2. Text us regularly. A good, sweet and touching text messages [SMS] make us melt.


3. Remember important dates. You have to be able to recall the “firsts and lasts” as far as events are concerned. Don’t forget “monthsary.” This is similar to anniversary but it’s celebrated every month e.g. 2nd monthsary means you’ve been together for 2 months already.


4. Make us “miss” you. It amplifies mystery and excitement.


5. Be a cowboy. Learn to eat fish balls, tukneneng [quail eggs] and squid balls with us.


6. Enjoy shopping with us. We know you hate carrying shopping bags but you’ve got to do it sometimes because Pinays like shopping a lot! (Well, but it’s not as if you’ve got to pay for everything.)


7. Don’t freak out when we talk about marriage and kids.


8. Don’t mess with us when we’re reading romance novels.


9. Love your mom! Yes, we do love guys who love and respect their mom but not to the point of being labeled as a “mama’s boy.”

Remember, that the above entries are personal opinions of Filipino men. Obviously, these opinions are based on their own experiences. But, they’re not conclusive. Courtship is not a bag of tricks and what worked for them doesn’t mean would also work for you. Remember, you belong to a different culture so things could be a little tougher. But so long as you have the purest of intentions, I think you can do well.


Personal: I’d like to say thank you to the person who gave me the idea for posting this topic. If you’re reading this, thanks a lot. I also want to give my warmest thanks to everyone who viewed my site, to those who appreciate what I do and to those I’ve made friends with over the last few days. To the wonderful people from MyBlogLog, Blog Catalog, Technorati, Bumpzee, StumbleUpon and Digg thank you and more power! - Pie



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